Winter: A Pointless Regional Survey (aka: Go home, winter!)

5 Mar

Recently, I moved from Greensboro, NC to Boston.

By “recently”, I mean that my lease started in January- which meant I moved just in time to experience Boston’s first cold snap (and the fourteen other subsequent cold snaps).

With all the insane winter storms Massachusetts has been hit with, I’ve gotten a number of texts from people outside of Boston telling me to, “Stay safe!” and that they “hope I’m okay!” which makes me think all of my friends picture me wandering outside in the winter snow, lost and confused.

I’m FINE! I have access to shelter, you guys!

(Also, I live within walking distance of a crepe shop. Life is pretty good.)

It’s different though. Having spent the last eight years in North Carolina, this weather is confusing and disorienting.

Once I came home, and there was a pillar of ice 8″ thick on the ground in front of my door. I naively wondered where it came from until I realized- IT CAME FROM THE SKY. Above me were icicles hanging off the roof the size of me. People in Boston don’t immediately understand why I’m half hysterical when I tell this story. It’s insane because in Greensboro, when there WERE icicles– THEY WERE ADORABLE! They accented the house. It was as if someone bought a string of them at K-Mart. Also, they weren’t able to kill me.

Bostonians are completely blasé about snow. There has been a “snow emergency” at least once a week for the past four weeks- but there seems to be absolutely no sense of urgency attached to the announcement. Other than the schools closing, it’s really just to let everyone know that they have to move their car.01 move asshole

01 everything is on fire

I’ve watched North Carolina deal with this winter from afar and the result hasn’t been surprising. North Carolina is the only place where it can snow and suddenly EVERYTHING IS ON FIRE. When it snowed in Greensboro, it was a cause for celebration. An inch of snow could bring the city to grinding halt. Kids would get school off and you would get an excuse to miss work (and the bars would remain open and be within walking distance).

Meanwhile, Boston has been under a perpetual foot of snow and everything has been fine. We have had some “warm” days, so it’s starting to melt (which basically means everything is either ice or a deep puddle of freezing sludge. Nothing in between).

This weather has been intense. While the Bostonians I have met are unfazed by everything happening around them, they are instantly apologetic once they hear I just moved here.

This is a conversation I’ve had several times:

ME: I’m from North Carolina, so this weather is… different.

THEM: Yeah, I’m sorry- it isn’t usually this bad.

ME: I forgive you.

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