Tag Archives: Patton Oswalt

Stuff That Happened This Week (July 7-14)

15 Jul

sthtw addams family

IN WHICH I FIND COOL STUFF ON THE INTERNET SO YOU DON’T HAVE TO! 

A weekly collection of kickass stuff I find on the internet.

Cool Stuff // And Also… // Articles // Videos // Trailers & TV/Movie News

DI Cool Stuff BarTEXAS POLITICIANS ARE TERRIFIED OF TAMPONS~  Texas politicians gathered at the state capitol on Friday to vote on an anti-abortion bill (which passed). The weird thing, though, is state troopers were confiscating tampons and maxi-pads at security. That sounds crazy, right? Surely there must be more to the story! The super-sleuths over at Twitchy (a site Michelle Malkin started up that draws its news from Twitter) had more to say: “Pro-aborts Whine About Tampon Confiscation at Texas Capitol; Fail To Say The Reason.

Guns were still allowed because there were no reports that people were going to either throw or shoot them at legislators [Twitchy]

Alright… so there you have it. No one FORMALLY announced that they were going to shoot a senator in the face so NO NEED TO WORRY ABOUT GUNS, YOU GUYS! Just to be clear- if people DID sneak in maxi-pads and tampons- the worst that would happen is that politicians would be embarrassed. Unless someone throws the entire BOX –there is very little chance of physical harm befalling anyone. Maxi-pads and tampons are mostly cotton. They are also super light. You can’t get enough velocity behind them to do any harm– unless you fashioned some sort of tampon nunchuck (which would be awesome and please do that someone!). WHEREAS- if someone forgot to let the world know that they were assassinating someone and brought in a gun- someone would probably legit die. Yeesh. In closing, enjoy this picture of Rick Santorum being pelted with tampons and maxi pads. [Huffington Post]

QUEERING UP MARVEL COMICS (because guys in tights just isn’t cutting it anymore)~ Andrew Garfield, the actor currently playing Spider-Man suggested Spider-man have a bi-racial boyfriend and everyone agreed with him and thought it was a great idea! Just kidding. They flipped their shit. Garfield was quoted as saying:

“What if MJ is a dude?’ Why can’t we discover that Peter is exploring his sexuality? It’s hardly even groundbreaking! So why can’t he be gay? Why can’t he be into boys?”

Spider-man could TOTALLY be into boys, you guys! He’s an attractive artsy type who lives in New York. AND YOU WOULD ONLY HAVE TO TWEEK THE THEME-SONG A LITTLE (Spider-man, Spider-man/your friendly bi-sexual Spider-man…). But people are HELLA sensitive about changes to the “traditional” Spider-man (“traditional” Spider-man being white and straight… just like every other Marvel superhero ever. Yawn.). The Internet was worked into a frenzy when there was a campaign to make Donald Glover the new Spiderman. People COULD NOT DEAL with a black Spider-man. Spider-man could not possibly be black! Donald Glover ended up not being the new Spider-man. There IS a black Spider-man, though. Why? Because Retroactive Continuity is totally a thing in the comic book world (and with studios rebooting franchises every eight years– it’s quickly becoming a thing in the movie world too). Superheroes have different histories and different stories depending on the series that they are in. So no matter what people INSIST– Spider-man can totally be black, or hispanic, or gay, or maybe even Canadian. If you know anyone who is flipping out over a bi-sexual Spider-Man, let them know that Helen Mirren suggested that Doctor Who should have a black, gay, LADY Doctor and watch their head explode. [The Mary Sue]

DI other stuff bar– Shitstorm added to German Dictionaries. [Planet Ivy]

– There is a giant T-Rex in Paris. T-Rex gloomily discovers that Parisians are all carbs. [Colossal]

– “15 Things That Escalated A Bit Too Quickly” [Buzzfeed]

– “Is This The Most Interesting Opening Paragraph Wikipedia’s Ever Published?” I want my Wikipedia page to have the same sort of gripping narrative. Also– I want to have a Wikipedia page. [Foreign Policy]

– The Miss Zandry Shop has awesome swag for ladies and feminists.  [TheMissZandryShop]

DI articles barA Closed Letter To Myself About Thievery, Heckling and Rape Jokes (Patton Oswalt)

What Did You Tell Your Kids After the Zimmerman Verdict? (Gene Demby // NPR)

DI videos bar“Everyone Is An Asshole” [College Humor]

“It’s Not About the Nail” [Jason Headley]

“Watch Alan Cumming Read Anything We Put In Front of Him” [Vulture]

The Time You Have (In Jellybeans) [Ze Frank]

Wadjda is the first movie to come out of Saudi Arabia that is directed by a woman. The movie looks like it will be funny and heartbreaking and I want to see it now. [Jezebel]

DI trailers and tv news barKristen Bell will be on Parks & Recreation [Entertainment Weekly]

Charlie Kaufman and Guillermo Del Toro are going to make a Slaughterhouse Five movie [Film School Rejects]

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Stuff That Happened This Week

21 May

doctor who fez STHTW

IN WHICH I FIND COOL STUFF ON THE INTERNET SO YOU DON’T HAVE TO! 

A weekly collection of kickass stuff I find on the internet.

Cool Stuff // And Also… // Articles // Videos // Trailers & TV/Movie News

DI Cool Stuff Bar

Kurt Braunohler is going to write funny things in the sky! ~ Comedian Kurt Braunohler successfully raised enough money on Kickstarter to fund his project– and that project is to write funny things in the sky. Braunohler has this to say about the project:

“Skywriting is crazy. We’re forcing clouds to say things. That’s inherently funny. How great would it be to look up one day and there’s a message in the sky, for no other reason other than itself. It’s not trying to sell you anything, it’s not trying to tell you something. It’s just there.”

Of the list of possible phrases Braunohler is thinking of using, my favorites are “HOW DO I LAND??” and “Clouds 4 EVA!” It would make my day to look up and see that in the sky. [Kurt Braunohler Kickstarter]

Denying Men Sex Is Like Child Neglect ~ The Wall Street Journal ran this article a while ago (“How Often Should Married Couples Have Sex“). I didn’t write about it because every time I tried to talk about, all that came out of my mouth was a sustained scream. The article chronicles the tortured year of a man who had to cope with a wife who refused to have sex with him. What monster woman would do such a thing?! It made him feel sad, you guys:

“He became grumpy, gained weight and stopped wanting to come home at night. “For me to feel good about myself, I needed her to have sex with me,” he says. “Otherwise I thought she didn’t love me.””

WHERE DID HE FIND THE COURAGE TO GO ON????!!! I’m not being blasé about this man’s problem. Intimacy is important in a relationship. HOWEVER, tucked away, towards the very end of the article, is a throwaway line mentioning the fact that his wife had a miscarriage. Do you think that might have affected her  just a little bit? There is nothing in the article to suggest that anything was being done to help her work through her emotional issues. But whatever. Let’s not lose focus- this man is not having sex. He even did chores for her! How rude. [New York Magazine]

DI other stuff bar

– 14 Reasons Why Life Should Be More Like Singin’ In The Rain [Buzzfeed]

– New poster for Catching Fire is BADASS [The Mary Sue]

– Origins of 9 British Insults [Mental Floss]

– Cocktail Chart of Film of Literature ~ This chart is pretty extensive. It has everything from a Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster (from The Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy) to a Gibson (from North by Northwest). Very cool. [Pop Chart Lab]

– “Give Yourself Permission to suck” ~ Exerpt from Michael Ian Black’s Rumpus interview on how to succeed in comedy/creative fields.  [Christine Friar]

 

DI articles bar

Can Men Be Funny? (Ellie Kemper // GQ)

What Commencement Speeches Are Missing (Andrew Guthrie Furguson // The Atlantic)

Stop Comparing Everything To Girls (Daniel D’Addario // Salon)

Ethics of Extreme Porn (Conor Friedersdorf //The Atlantic)


DI videos bar

17 A Capella Covers of Indie Rock Songs [Buzzfeed]

Tig Notaro’s Lessons In Remaining In the Moment [Team Coco]

Supercut of people in the movies screaming “NOOOOOOO!” [The Mary Sue]

Stephen Colbert’s Commencement Speech at UVA [Uproxx]

 

DI trailers and tv news barSleepy Hollow trailer ~ Alex Kurtzman and Roberto Orci re-imagine the Sleepy Hollow story in this new FOX drama.

Super Fun Night trailer ~ Trailer for Rebel Wilson’s new show on ABC.

The Goldbergs trailer ~ Trailer for Patton Oswalt, Jeff Garlin, and Wendi McLendon-Covey’s new show on ABC.

Clip from the new Whose Line Is It Anyway? ~ Ugh. These people are delightful.

 

The Best Responses To The Tragedy In Boston

22 Apr

 “There’s only one rule that I know of, babies—God damn it, you’ve got to be kind.”

-Kurt Vonnegut

Last week, the news was pretty much dominated by everything going down in Boston.

After bombs were detonated at the Boston Marathon, there was a lot of chaos and confusion. The attack was savage and pointless. It was a dark and painful time for the people of Boston (and everyone holding Boston in their thoughts).

People rallied around Boston.

And despite everything, ultimately, people helped each other out.

With all the awfulness of the bombings, it was heartening to see.

Stephen Colbert’s cold open is a tribute to Boston (and their badass-itude)

Stephen Colbert addressed the bombing at the top of his show. He offered condolences to the people of Boston, but also declared his confidence that Boston would not be shaken by anyone:

“As the President said, we don’t know who did this, but they will be found and will be brought to justice. But whoever did this obviously did not know shit about the people of Boston. Because nothing these terrorists do is going to shake them. For Pete’s sakes! Boston was founded by the pilgrims– a people so tough they had to buckle their goddam hats on!

It is incredibly moving… as well as incredibly funny.

(Jon Stewart also had some touching things to say about Boston.)

mr rogersMr. Roger’s tells us to “look for the helpers.”

There really isn’t a time where quoting Mr. Rogers would go amiss. The man was a beacon of kindness.

Anyway, in light of recent tragedies, this quote has been making it’s way around the internet (here is the actual clip).

In times of trouble, “look for the helpers.

It’s helpful to remember.

Patton Oswalt reminds us that “the good guys” are there… and they are badasses.

Comedian Patton Oswalt wrote a statement that to echoed the same thing Rogers was saying.

So when you spot violence, or bigotry, or intolerance or fear or just garden-variety misogyny, hatred or ignorance, just look it in the eye and think, “The good outnumber you, and we always will.

  • People from around the world offer Boston their support…  [Buzzfeed]
  • Amy Poehler On Coping With Excessive/Violent Images (“I love you, Boston”) [Smart Girls]
  • Dunkin’ Donuts remained open to help Emergency Responders (because that’s how Dunkin’ Donuts ROLLS!) [Bostino]
  • There were a handful of runners who ran the Boston Marathon AGAIN to show how un-terrorized they are. [Buzzfeed]

How You Can Help Boston